Venerable Khemaka is ill, and some elder bhikkhus ask Dāsaka to convey their concern to him. A series of exchanges ensue, mediated by Dāsaka, until Khemaka, despite his illness, goes to see the elder bhikkhus himself. The elders inquire about his understanding of the Dhamma. Khemaka explains that while he does not identify any of the five aggregates (form, feeling, perception, formations, and consciousness) as self, he still experiences a subtle “I am” conceit associated with these aggregates. He likens this to the lingering scent on a cleaned cloth, which eventually fades away.
On one occasion, several elder bhikkhus were dwelling in Kosambi at Ghosita’s Park. At that time, the venerable Khemaka was residing at the Jujube Tree Park, and he was sick, experiencing pain, and gravely ill.
The Back and Forth
Then, in the evening, those elder bhikkhus, having come out of seclusion, addressed the venerable Dāsaka: “Come, friend Dāsaka, go to the bhikkhu Khemaka and speak to him thus: ‘The elders, friend Khemaka, ask whether you are bearing up, whether you are enduring, whether your painful feelings are subsiding and not increasing, and whether there is a sign of their subsiding and not increasing.’”
“Yes, friends,” the venerable Dāsaka replied to the elder bhikkhus, and he went to the venerable Khemaka. Having gone there, he spoke to the venerable Khemaka thus:
“The elders, friend Khemaka, ask whether you are bearing up, whether you are enduring, whether your painful feelings are subsiding and not increasing, and whether there is a sign of their subsiding and not increasing.”
“Friend, I am not bearing up, not enduring, my painful feelings are not subsiding but increasing, and there is no sign of their subsiding,” replied Khemaka.
Then the venerable Dāsaka returned to the elder bhikkhus and reported: “Friend Khemaka said: ‘I am not bearing up, not enduring, my painful feelings are not subsiding but increasing, and there is no sign of their subsiding.’”
The elders said: “Come, friend Dāsaka, go again to Khemaka and speak to him thus: ‘The elders, friend Khemaka, say that the Blessed One has spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. Do you, venerable Khemaka, regard any of these five aggregates as self or as belonging to self?’”
“Yes, friends,” Dāsaka replied to the elder bhikkhus and went again to Khemaka. Having gone there, he spoke to Khemaka as instructed: “The elders, friend Khemaka, say that the Blessed One has spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. Do you, venerable Khemaka, regard any of these five aggregates as self or as belonging to self?”
“Friend, the Blessed One has indeed spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. In these five aggregates, I do not regard anything as self or as belonging to self,” replied Khemaka.
Then the venerable Dāsaka returned to the elder bhikkhus and reported: “Friend Khemaka said: ‘The Blessed One has spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. In these five aggregates, I do not regard anything as self or as belonging to self.’”
The elders said: “Come, friend Dāsaka, go again to Khemaka and speak to him thus: ‘The elders, friend Khemaka, say that the Blessed One has spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. If you, venerable Khemaka, do not regard anything in these five aggregates as self or as belonging to self, then you are an arahant, one whose taints are destroyed.’”
“Yes, friends,” Dāsaka replied to the elder bhikkhus and went again to Khemaka. Having gone there, he spoke to Khemaka as instructed: “The elders, friend Khemaka, say that the Blessed One has spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. If you, venerable Khemaka, do not regard anything in these five aggregates as self or as belonging to self, then you are an arahant, one whose taints are destroyed.”
“Friend, the Blessed One has indeed spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. In these five aggregates, I do not regard anything as self or as belonging to self, nor am I an arahant whose taints are destroyed. However, in these five aggregates, there remains the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency.”
Then the venerable Dāsaka returned to the elder bhikkhus and reported: “Friend Khemaka said: ‘The Blessed One has spoken of five aggregates subject to clinging: the form aggregate, the feeling aggregate, the perception aggregate, the formations aggregate, and the consciousness aggregate. In these five aggregates, I do not regard anything as self or as belonging to self, nor am I an arahant whose taints are destroyed. However, in these five aggregates, there remains the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency.’”
The elders said: “Come, friend Dāsaka, go again to Khemaka and speak to him thus: 'The elders, friend Khemaka, ask: What do you mean by saying, ‘I am’? Do you mean that form is ‘I am,’ or do you mean something other than form? Do you mean that feeling is ‘I am,’ or something other than feeling? Do you mean that perception is ‘I am,’ or something other than perception? Do you mean that formations are ‘I am,’ or something other than formations? Do you mean that consciousness is ‘I am,’ or something other than consciousness? What exactly do you mean by saying, ‘I am’?”
“Yes, friends,” Dāsaka replied to the elder bhikkhus and went again to Khemaka. Having gone there, he spoke to Khemaka as instructed: “The elders, friend Khemaka, ask: What do you mean by saying, ‘I am’? Do you mean that form is ‘I am,’ or do you mean something other than form? Do you mean that feeling is ‘I am,’ or something other than feeling? Do you mean that perception is ‘I am,’ or something other than perception? Do you mean that formations are ‘I am,’ or something other than formations? Do you mean that consciousness is ‘I am,’ or something other than consciousness? What exactly do you mean by saying, ‘I am’?”
“Enough, friend Dāsaka, why this roundabout talk? Bring a staff; I will go to the elders myself,” replied Khemaka.
Then the venerable Khemaka took a staff and went to the elders. Having approached them, he exchanged greetings with the elder bhikkhus and, after a courteous conversation, sat down to one side.
Khemaka shares on the way of practice to eradicate the conceit ‘I am’
The elder bhikkhus then asked him: “What do you mean by saying, ‘I am’? Do you mean that form is ‘I am,’ or do you mean something other than form? Do you mean that feeling is ‘I am,’ or something other than feeling? Do you mean that perception is ‘I am,’ or something other than perception? Do you mean that formations are ‘I am,’ or something other than formations? Do you mean that consciousness is ‘I am,’ or something other than consciousness? What exactly do you mean by saying, ‘I am’?”
“Friends, I do not say that form is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than form is ‘I am.’ I do not say that feeling is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than feeling is ‘I am.’ I do not say that perception is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than perception is ‘I am.’ I do not say that formations are ‘I am,’ nor that something other than formations is ‘I am.’ I do not say that consciousness is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than consciousness is ‘I am.’ However, in these five aggregates, there remains the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency.”
“Friends, consider the scent of a lotus, water lily, or white lotus. If someone were to say, ‘The scent belongs to the petals,’ or ‘The scent belongs to the color,’ or ‘The scent belongs to the stamens,’ would they be correct?”
“No, friend.”
“Then, how, friend, would one rightly explain it?”
“One would rightly explain, friend, ‘It is the scent of the flower.’”
“In the same way, friend, I do not say that form is ‘I am,’ nor do I say that something other than form is ‘I am.’ I do not say that feeling is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than feeling is ‘I am.’ I do not say that perception is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than perception is ‘I am.’ I do not say that formations are ‘I am,’ nor that something other than formations is ‘I am.’ I do not say that consciousness is ‘I am,’ nor that something other than consciousness is ‘I am.’ However, in these five aggregates subject to clinging, there remains the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency.”
“Friend, even though a noble disciple has abandoned the five lower fetters, still the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency remains. Over time, he contemplates the arising and passing away of the five aggregates: ‘Such is form, such is the arising of form, such is the passing away of form; such is feeling, such is the arising of feeling, such is the passing away of feeling; such is perception, such is the arising of perception, such is the passing away of perception; such are formations, such is the arising of formations, such is the passing away of formations; such is consciousness, such is the arising of consciousness, such is the passing away of consciousness.’ Contemplating thus, the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency is fully eradicated.”
“Just as, friend, a cloth that is soiled and stained with dirt is given by its owners to a washer. The washer, having rubbed it with saline cleaning salt, lye, or cow dung, washes it clean in water. Even though the cloth becomes clean and bright, a residual odor of saline cleaning salt, lye, or cow dung may remain. The washer then returns the cloth to the owners, who store it in a fragrant box. Whatever residual odor remains, eventually, that too disappears.”
“In the same way, friend, even though a noble disciple has abandoned the five lower fetters, still the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency remains. Over time, he contemplates the arising and passing away of the five aggregates: ‘Such is form, such is the arising of form, such is the passing away of form; such is feeling, such is the arising of feeling, such is the passing away of feeling; such is perception, such is the arising of perception, such is the passing away of perception; such are formations, such is the arising of formations, such is the passing away of formations; such is consciousness, such is the arising of consciousness, such is the passing away of consciousness.’ Contemplating thus, the ‘I am’ conceit, ‘I am’ desire, and ‘I am’ underlying tendency is fully eradicated.”
Having spoken thus, the elder bhikkhus said to the venerable Khemaka: “Friend Khemaka, we did not ask you these questions to trouble you, but because you are capable of explaining, teaching, establishing, revealing, analyzing, and elucidating the Blessed One’s teaching in detail. And this, venerable Khemaka, you have done: you have explained, taught, established, revealed, analyzed, and elucidated the Blessed One’s teaching in detail.”
The venerable Khemaka spoke these words, and the elder bhikkhus rejoiced in the venerable Khemaka’s words. As this discourse was being given, the minds of sixty elder bhikkhus were liberated from the taints without grasping, including that of the venerable Khemaka.
This teaching highlights the subtlety and depth of the Dhamma practice. Even after significant progress, such as abandoning the five lower fetters, residual attachments like the “I am” conceit can persist. The analogy of the lingering scent on a cleaned cloth shows how continued practice of the eightfold path leads to the fading away of the “I am” conceit gradually.
Related Teachings:
The Simile of the Tree Trunk | Eight obstacles to avoid on the path of enlightenment (SN 35.241) - The Buddha gives a parable of a large log floating downstream, which, if it steers clear of the many obstacles, will eventually reach the ocean. A mendicant asks for an explanation, and the Buddha clarifies each item. A cowherd named Nanda was listening, and determined to go forth.
Teachings on Living Beings and the Five Aggregates - A series of teachings that the Buddha shared on living beings and the five aggregates. The five aggregates of form, feeling, perception, volitions (choices) and consciousness, when fully understood, lead to freedom from strong feelings, to wisdom, to liberation.
Buddha answers 10 questions on the aggregates (SN 22.82) - On a full moon night with the Sangha at Sāvatthi, the Buddha answers a series of ten questions on the aggregates.