How do you get other people to speak with you? Usually I never know what to say in response.
Being a chatterbox hasn’t worked out too well throughout my life. Even in my second language, German, it’s evident im sort of a “parrot” when it comes to learned social phrases.
Socially exhausted right now and feeling like an alien.
Usually when I try this strategy, I might fall flat on my face by not knowing anything at all what I just asked about. Should one thing of every small talk excursion as an onion?
What I mean by an onion is to be able to organize the depth of the conversation by extent of discussion. To transform the comment into a dialogue is most desirable. Small talk is the goal here, just not the robotic:
“I like your Kansas City Chiefs Jersey!”
“Oh thanks, did you see how Frank Footballer did that pass against the Steelers?”
“Not really, but my grandmother always had the TV on and loved the Super Bowl!”
“Cool, buddy!”
After this, it’s like a game over screen is flashed before my eyes. Not to be dramatic, but this situation happens in many domains of conversation for me.
Do you have any extended advice for this?
“You, know, I hear people talk about that a lot, but honestly, I have no idea what it actually is. Can you give me some pointers?”
Now they are your mentor.