I realized I am not trans but incredibly envious of hot women and their ability to have sex whenever they like. WHENEVER they like. That sometimes makes me dream of being a woman, having this privilege to act all decent but blow and fu** as often as I please.

But then I realize that as an ugly middle aged fuck, my biggest fantasy always was being sexually attractive (at least a little bit), so I keep searching the web for porn that fuels this fantasy, quietly weeping inside and pathetically wanking my way to my grave.

Anyone else?

• Common joker
• Common joker
• Broke
• Restart run
• Repeat

I kinda like TWG Tea 1837.

Are you sure it wasn’t a star and is your wife’s name Claire Cooper, by any chance? https://youtu.be/JNRPa6Mmqm8

Americans be like

Well, the ruling classes of Iran, China and Russia are our enemy. And because those three countries are autocracies that automatically means they are our enemies as well.

Not trying to compare these two things, but as a German it always stroke me as odd that many Americans will go to any lengths in order to defend their right to bear arms, but they all totally accept the fact that there’s not a single highway in the US without a speed limit.

In Germany, it seems to be the other way round. Noone really cares that guns are strictly regulated but most people will fiercely oppose the introduction of speed limits with the same level of fanaticism of American gun nuts.

If you were a refugee from 9gag like me, you would probably think differently. That place is filled with racist memes.

He’s gonna run for president some time in the future, mark my words. And he’s gonna be a lot worse than Trump.

Who the f*** dares to downvote a word my brother invented when he was 7?

Bettdeckenbezugsschonersonnenblumenmusterwebfehler.