Plot twitst: I dont have any webcams. Lol.
I work as a sysadmin and had a user in my building call us about one of these emails. I didn’t say it out loud but, if it wasn’t true, why would he even feel the need to ask if it was real or possible?
Hello, my perverted friend.
I’ve come to wank with you again.
On a webcam soft-ly stroking
To a vid of extreme poking
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
The art
Of coitus
Congrats, y’all are the first ever post in Lemmy Sings!
Damn. 5 Times a Day? Aren’t you getting sore or anything?
I think if they have videos of me jerking off they owe me money, not the other way around. That’s how onlyfans works right?
My likeness is owned by PornHub and our legal team will be in touch.
Please remain where you are.
Joke’s on them, I don’t care if anyone knows I jerk off, or what I jerk off to.
Invest some time in transferring to a new email address but also an email alias service. That way you never give out your new email address to anyone and give each site/service you use its own alias.
Threaten them with a copyright strike…
Have they learned nothing from that plagiarism video?
The first rule of blackmail: supply proof. Not hints or riddles; proof. If they don’t attach pictures (or a severed thumb, whatever) it’s nonsense.
From the spammers’ perspective, though, they sent millions of emails like this at basically zero cost; my catch-all mailbox for five domains gets about a dozen a day. If one moron pays up it’s work it to them.
I can appreciate that the plot twist wasn’t: “I don’t jerk off”
