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Traumadumping isn’t just telling your friends about your problems, it’s using them as a sole emotional crutch and putting them in a position emotionally that they aren’t equipped to handle, while a therapist is equipped to handle it and in fact that is their job. Therapists shouldn’t be so expensive imo they should be included in health care (which should be universal everywhere in a better world just sayin), and going to a therapist doesn’t mean you can’t share your woes with your friends but it can teach you healthier ways to do so.
I firmly believe setting boundaries like depicted in the screenshot is a healthy thing to do. However you’re feeling you can’t dump that on the same people day after day when they have their own shit to deal with, even if they love you
What a beautiful quote
I love Oscar Wilde’s quotes. They have a poignancy that rarely matched in English language, in my experience.
there’s a difference between traumadumping and sharing some trauma/sorrow/sadness. i compare it with my girlfriend, her family is composed of the worse human beings i ever encountered in this shit hole of earth, and if she said to me be every shit that they do every day that hapoen with them, it start fucking with me, my mental, my capability to help her, my emotional etc, that’s why she go to the therapist, so she don’t share every day shit that her family do and making me worry and only say to me things that matter
but she started working and studying now, so she spend less and less time with them, leaving less time for them to be assholes, what help me alot
As someone who never heard of the term before, I assume that if traumadumping was just sharing trauma then it wouldn’t be called trauma dumping.
The overwhelming nature is what makes it dumping, as I’m your example.
Correct. A common part of psychoeducation for depressed, anxious, and personality-disordered patients is how to properly distribute the emotional load across multiple interpersonal relationships and make sure those people are being rewarded for their support with things like supporting them when they need it and making sure to have regular interactions based around good/happy things.
A lot of people wind up in inpatient psychiatry due to their social supports crumbling under too much or improperly distributed emotional stress. You don’t want to fixate on the concept, excessively worrying about bothering people isn’t the goal here. It’s more to just be mindful that you need to give people some good news too; if they’re really your friends they also want to hear that good things have happened to you.
I left a discord server because their mods would delete anything that got too real. Like, it was so bad, you couldn’t actually have a conversation in any of the channels. If you weren’t just making one-liner jokes or posting memes, the conversation would be deleted by a mod and you’d be threatened with a ban.
All because their reasoning was “we are not therapists. Our users are not therapists.” No shit. But friends talk to each other, too. I suppose being discord mods, they’ve never actually had any friends to know that, though.
Oscar Wilde was a drama queen 😉
Sometimes it helps to have someone get dramatically offended on your behalf.
