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Da Cap’n@lemmy.dbzer0.com to News@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 year ago

Trump Orders Musk to Get Air Force One Finished Quickly, Even If It Isn't Fully Safe Yet

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Trump Orders Musk to Get Air Force One Finished Quickly, Even If It Isn't Fully Safe Yet

futurism.com

Da Cap’n@lemmy.dbzer0.com to News@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 year ago
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Donald Trump is bringing in Elon Musk to speed up Boeing's lagging construction of two new Air Force One jets.
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  • regrub@lemmy.world
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    deleted by creator

    • KoboldCoterie@pawb.social
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      Some Boeing workers could be real American heroes right about now.

      • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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        Quality Assurance is really over rated. DOGE should cut those fuck faces first for freedom fighters sake.

        • sndmn@lemmy.caBanned
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          Boeing, QA… lol

      • cybervseas@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        In Japan, heart surgeon. Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But, mistake! Yakuza boss die. Yakuza very mad. I hide in fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car, and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret: I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!

        • 3x7x37@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          deleted by creator

          • cybervseas@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            The Office

      • meathorse@lemmy.world
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        A real team effort if the air traffic controllers join the effort too

      • Florencia (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 year ago

        By royal decree, the children of maintenance workers are to travel in the rear of the aircraft. /s

      • Mirshe@lemmy.world
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        I’m reminded of that one time the entire Polish government was killed in a plane crash in Smolensk.

    • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
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      The worst thing that could happen would be nothing going wrong.

    • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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      They should just screw the schedule and get on the plane right now

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Well, the BEST that could happen would be for it to crash into the side of a mountain while both of them are on it. Bonus points if Vance, Johnson, and Stephen Miller are on it too.

    • floofloof@lemmy.ca
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      I hear duct tape is good for holding wings on, in a pinch.

      • KickMeElmo@sopuli.xyz
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        You joke, but you have no idea how much speed tape gets used on the average plane…

        • porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml
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          Ah, is that how they go so fast?

          • Klear@lemmy.world
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            Nah, that’s the red paint all over their insides.

    • Ledericas@lemm.ee
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      probably repurpose/ reused used spacex, tesla vehicle materials

  • shittydwarf@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    • NatakuNox@lemmy.world
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      I’m pretty handy with a roll of construction tape if they need help.

  • taiyang@lemmy.world
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    An underpaid Boeing engineer has a chance to accidentally do one of the funniest, most earth saving oopsies of all time.

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    • underisk@lemmy.ml
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      I don’t think they let the VP travel in the same plane at the same time so probably not as earth saving as you’d expect. Definitely very funny though.

      • overload@sopuli.xyz
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        Well, there are two planes being rushed…

        • Jericho_Kane@lemmy.org
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          Air force one and air force two hit eachother mid air 10 hour ASMR to fall asleep to.

        • Goun@lemmy.ml
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          So we can put Musk on one plane, then Vance and Trump on the other one, perfect

          • overload@sopuli.xyz
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            🤌

      • Goodmorningsunshine@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Good think Skum isn’t VP. There’s no law to say he and that corpse he keeps company in the oval office can’t fly and die together.

  • TransplantedSconie@lemm.ee
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    deleted by creator

    • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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      I think glitch McCuntel has a pilot’s license. Let him and Jesus take the wheel.

      • glitch1985@lemmy.world
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        Full Self Flying has got everything under control

      • mister_flibble@lemm.ee
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        Maybe one of those OceanGate guys who didn’t turn into a fine pink mist can hook him up with a MadCatz controller

    • AlternatePersonMan@lemmy.world
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      The irony would be delicious

    • hansolo@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      The AP will be the only media that survives.

  • Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    If Musk can fly a rocket, Trump reportedly told associates, per the NYT, he can probably fly an airplane.

    You guys are all such a joke.

    Sucks millions or billions will die when you blame the plane crash on Canada or Denmark or Ukraine.

    • sfxrlz@lemmy.world
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      Or DEI … again

      • meco03211@lemmy.world
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        Has no one made the gif from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas when Dr. Gonzo opens the salt shaker of cocaine and subtitled it “Did you see what god DEI did to us?”

        • jaybone@lemmy.world
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          I want to see Musk “flying” a rocket Dr. Strangelove style.

    • Glitterbomb@lemmy.world
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      Is that pile of punctuation another one of elons kids?

    • NotSteve_@lemmy.ca
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      or Mexico, or Panama, or the UK, or everyone except for the AFD in Germany.

      The US is looking awfully lonely right now

  • GalacticGrapefruit@lemmy.world
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    Please, God, if you’re listening, do something really really funny with this.

    • samus12345@lemm.ee
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      “Didn’t you people learn from the Holocaust that I either don’t exist or am evil if I do?”

      • MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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        Not evil, indifferent.

        • samus12345@lemm.ee
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          If he has the power to stop the suffering, being indifferent to it is evil. If not, sure.

          • MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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            Maybe, but does your indifference to the insects you kill while hiking make you evil?

            • stetech@lemmy.world
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              Maybe, but did you just compare millions of human beings’ suffering to a handful of insects?

              Besides, why are you comparing individuals’ indifference to God’s (potential) indifference? I don’t think that’s a fair comparison.

              • MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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                If you’re a God, yes.

            • samus12345@lemm.ee
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              Only if I’m doing so intentionally. I don’t have the power to know where every insect is and keep them from harm accordingly.

    • Naz@sh.itjust.works
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      Holy shit so many desperate prayers in one thread

      I think they can be convinced to pause their game of Jenga or Connect Four for a few minutes of structural integrity or engine failure

      The Big Man … Big Entity has Big Priorities, you know?

    • NoxAstrum@lemmy.ca
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      With the recent history in aviation, I’m going to be praying like mad. Please tell me they’re still Boeing products?

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    Boeing, Musk, and a rushed time frame? I’ve rarely seen a better recipe for disaster. Maybe we are lucky and Trump and his cronies just fall from the sky even on the first flight.

    • Klear@lemmy.world
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      It would be a nice reminder that a disaster isn’t the same thing as a tragedy.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        I don’t know, President Vance sounds like a tragedy to me…

        • Klear@lemmy.world
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          Yeah, there’s no way he’d be on the Air Force One. He’s always flying couch.

          • jaybone@lemmy.world
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            Chair Force One

        • Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          Better an uncharismatic couch fucker being unable to talk his way out of hot water than a geriatric orange Hitler.

          • Ledericas@lemm.ee
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            hes allegedly searched up dolphin paraphelia before too.

    • ImADifferentBird@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      And don’t forget gutting the FAA.

      • Treczoks@lemmy.world
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        The only job the FAA has with regards to Airforce One is to keep the sky free if AO is up there. Might be a problem, though.

    • demizerone@lemmy.world
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      The worst that can happen is the plane falls out of the sky and some how Trump survives while everyone else dies.

      • Treczoks@lemmy.world
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        Well, he is no angel, so the chance that he would fly is neglectable.

  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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    If Musk can fly a rocket, Trump reportedly told associates, per the NYT, he can probably fly an airplane.

    He’s never been on one of his rockets. He’s too chickenshit. Fuck Bezos, but at least he had the balls to go up on a Blue Origin rocket. If you think Musk is ever going to Mars, you’re wrong.

    • Ledericas@lemm.ee
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      he knows his rockets are shoddy at best, why would he. has he ever driven his own teslas?

  • xenomor@lemmy.world
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    trump killing himself by using Musk to skirt safety precautions so he can feel special riding around in a shiny new ego tube might be enough to get me wondering if god exists.

  • Dorkyd68@lemmy.world
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    “Trump dies in fatal Boeing crash, after rushing its production” is a headline id love to see

    • kent_eh@lemmy.ca
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      “Trump dies in fatal Boeing crash, after rushing its production” is a headline id love to see

      After rushing it’s production and firing all the FAA safety inspectors.

    • leadore@lemmy.world
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      That can be improved by inserting “and Musk” after the first word.

      • yourgodlucifer@sh.itjust.works
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        Don’t forget JD Vance!

        • VindictiveJudge@lemmy.world
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          As VP, Vance would be on Air Force Two as a precaution.

          • yourgodlucifer@sh.itjust.works
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            Both planes crash into each other

      • Jumpingspiderman@lemmy.world
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        please_god_so_fucking_funny.png

        Please, I can only get so hard

    • ameancow@lemmy.world
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      deleted by creator

      • leadore@lemmy.world
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        Or maybe make things worse.

        I’m willing to take that chance.

      • NoxAstrum@lemmy.ca
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        It does feel like alternative history.

        • ameancow@lemmy.world
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          deleted by creator

    • zergtoshi@lemmy.world
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      Where can I donate funds to this cause?

    • hightrix@lemmy.world
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      There would be a celebration in the streets. Doubly so if Musk was also onboard.

  • RIPandTERROR@sh.itjust.works
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    • exploitedamerican@lemm.ee
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      Would be even better if they got boeing to help too. Would be just the best plane ever, such a great plane. Other people would look at it (as it explodes in a fireball in the sky) and say wow what a beautiful thing

    • SkupaSalataNaPopustu@lemmy.ml
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      We know you can make it happen God, we’ve seen you do it with that skit-of-skits billionaire sub thing God. We know you just need them to all willingly line up God. Well they’re lining up, God! They’re willingly lining up! It’s your time to shine God!

      • MedicsOfAnarchy@lemmy.world
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        John 14:13

        And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.

  • PugJesus@lemmy.world
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    Finally, a Trump order I agree with

  • SarcasticMan@lemmy.world
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    A boy can only dream ;)

  • Lemminary@lemmy.world
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    Please let them both ride it together, please please please.

    • MedicsOfAnarchy@lemmy.world
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      And take the new FBI director, I hear he likes plane rides.

  • MiDaBa@lemmy.ml
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    Trump is completely right on this issue. Despite the fact his plane is produced by a company plagued with consistent quality control issues I believe this should be rushed into service as quickly as possible. In fact, I agree that the anyone including temp workers should be allowed in to get this thing in the air today.

    • NoxAstrum@lemmy.ca
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      I’ll even help.

    • MedicsOfAnarchy@lemmy.world
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      All those lights and dials and displays in the cockpit take the pilot’s attention off of flying. Don’t need 'em.

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